So, My Stats Are a Little Sad After the Move, and They Want Me to Visit Extra Right Now…

I’m obsessing, but I’m not blind, so I notice this small banner from FeedBurner today:

A free vinyl-y sticker could be yours for the low price of a self-addressed stamped envelope.

 

1. When you use the word “vinyl-y,” I am automatically not interested. Ugh. Please tell me who your target market is. Are there people who say “ooh, vinyl-y,” in any demographic? Not even “vinyl.” Note that well. “Vinyl-y,” as in “even vinyl would be too classy for you suckers.”

2. When you use the word “free,” you may not use it in conjunction with the phrase “for the low price of.” ‘Cuz that’s not free, people.

3. And perhaps most glaring: There’s so little information here, yet I have rarely heard an offer that was less appealing than this. What is it and why would I want such a thing? Are you kidding?

Maybe I should have clicked on the link. I hope they are kidding.

Takeaways: Know who you’re talking to. Talk benefits, not features (I hate to call “vinyl-y” a feature, but let’s face it, it’s not a benefit). Never, never say free if there’s a cost involved.

Don’t be slippery. Or vinyl-y.

How about you? Do you know who you’re talking to, and why they’d want what you offer?

Sounds simple, but it’s one of the hardest questions to answer simply. If you haven’t had a chance to check out my guest post at Just Creative Design, Dudes and Dolls and Design Decisions, you may find some answers there.

 

Grow and be well,

Kelly Erickson