(If You’re Using Them, That Is)
These Signs Aren’t Doing Their Job!
Whether you’re a bricks-and-mortar store or simply have a little sign on your business card (yes, that’s a sign of sorts, all you work-from-home folks), there’s something here for you to think about.
What’s the job of your signage? To be readable, clear, interesting, and memorable. To begin the Customer Experience. If I can’t read and understand it, don’t care, or can’t remember it when I’ve driven three blocks, it ain’t working. That, folks, is your money flying out the window. From large scale to small, we’ve got it all today:
Billboards
They’ve been up for a while, and I drive by them every day. I’ve tried, but I just don’t care.
Lesson: Make it relevant, and not too darned clever. Give me a hint! There isn’t enough information on either of these to make me want to know more.
LED Signs
It’s not the message, it’s pure design here. You may think these are close to unreadable, but unfortunately my camera has made them appear far better than they look in reality. The insane color clashing of the first and the outlined type of the second both vibrate when you see them on the street. Until I stopped to take the photo I didn’t know what the second one said. It’s that bad.
Lesson: If you must have an LED sign, please, make the type very, very simple. Calling to ask my advice? Don’t get an LED sign.
User-Unfriendly “Signs”
Sign in all the bathrooms at my local library. (There’s a sign on the outside of each door instructing us to knock, as if this weren’t enough.)
At a nearby car wash, you’d better pay first.
Two things are going on here, and only one has to do with possibly stupid users. The other has to do with the businesses who must make these “for dummies” signs: I don’t know why the manufacturer made a lock that’s so hard to understand, but why did you buy it? If you didn’t realize all the trouble it would cause, but you do now, why on Earth don’t you replace the locks today?
For the coin-op car wash, it’s even simpler: fix it!
Lesson: People of all ages, abilities, and languages will use your facilities as you grow your business. You do want plenty of customers, don’t you? Keep things in good repair, and be accessible to all so you won’t need “Hey dummy” signage. Aggravating your customers is not best business practice.
Hat tip to Steve for another great example of restroom signage, and to Amy for a lively discussion of professional life and the potty. How could I say no to putting up my signage post, when the signs were written in the ether?
Seen any good ones in your town? Wallet-sized or wall-sized, what does a sign have to do to blow you away?
Grow and be well,
Kelly Erickson
P.S. I’m usually mum about my schedule, but let’s not kid ourselves: tomorrow I’ll be in the birthplace of this nation as I always am (if I’m within driving distance) on the 4th, soaking up the history I love so well. Harry, I wish you were here to give me a tour in style.
I’ll be around today of course, but if I’m kinda quiet tomorrow, my apologies; you’ll just have to meet me on the Parkway.
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3 July 2008, 8:02 am
Need I mention the sign above the stairs near my office that warns you not to fall down the stairs?
You know – right when you should be looking DOWN at the stairs, your eye is drawn upwards by the cartoon sign of a person falling down the stairs!
Ugh.
-Brett
Brett Legree’s last blog post…draw your own line.
3 July 2008, 8:19 am
Brett,
Ah ha ha ha ha I forgot all about that one!
Minimum Employee Experience, also known as what were they thinking of?
Regards,
Kelly
3 July 2008, 8:23 am
Kelly,
I could provide a photo but that would be doocin’ so maybe not a good thing… at least until I am but a fleeting memory here!
-Brett
Brett Legree’s last blog post…draw your own line.
3 July 2008, 9:08 am
One of my favorite signs is at a road-side restaurant that says “SCREAM UNTIL DADDY STOPS THE CAR”.
I’ve never actually seen one but I’ve seen photos. This joke has been done and re-done ad infinitum, but I still laugh every time I hear about it.
Friar’s last blog post…It’s almost like they’re proud of it…
3 July 2008, 11:22 am
@Friar: HAHAHAHAHAHA!
@Kelly: hmmm, that picnic one has me curious.
steph’s last blog post…Commit to the Reward
3 July 2008, 11:24 am
Huh. It’s a picnic site. Who knew. Pig had me confused in the sign, but it’s one of the dressed up characters at the Brandywine Park… What’s even more confusing is the website design, which takes on the look of an old movie theatre venue.
steph’s last blog post…Commit to the Reward
3 July 2008, 1:27 pm
Brett,
I do worry about you folks getting dooced once in a while, but I think you walk the line pretty well. That’s the toughest balancing act of all though. Truth to power, or more accurately, truth obliquely discussing power without naming names…
^^
. .
^
o
Friar,
Funny, as long as it’s in someone else’s car. We have a saying in my house. What does throwing a fit get you? Nothing.
If my kid tried that she knows she’d be a hungry little chick before I’d stop.
It has backfired in a way. She never screams until she gets XYZ, but she does have the persuasive powers of the very best attorneys, copywriters, marketers…. “Mama, here are the 17 well-argued reasons why stopping at that greasy spoon will enhance your life.”
I stop quickly, so I don’t have to hear all 17.
Steph,
For weeks I’ve driven by it and even last night as I was uploading the photo, I had zero curiosity what picnic.com was. I vaguely wondered whether they were advertising pigs, pork products, picnics, beaches… then immediately forgot. I even took the photo a week or two ago for this post, and still couldn’t remind myself to look into it. *big, big yawn*
Thanks for checking, because it occurred to me this morning that it could be something rude and I really should have peeked, at least, before putting it on the blog for ever and always.
We have dressed up characters at the Brandywine Park? Huh. Who knew. It’s a little place, I can’t imagine why. See, with just a little more info, I’m almost curious.
Until later,
Kelly
3 July 2008, 2:09 pm
Kelly,
I’d just call it “discussion of OPEX (OPerational EXperience) with an external consultant” – prove me wrong!!! I’m hoping they have bigger fish to fry anyway.
I thought maybe the pig was a refugee from the Piggly Wiggly chain or something (I love that name for a store).
-Brett
3 July 2008, 2:36 pm
Brett,
For the safety of your nation and the one close enough to have genetic mutations from SNAFUs, I HOPE they have bigger fish to fry.
Besides, bread and circuses don’t work anymore. If they found you letting off OPEX steam, they should let you. I’d say these days more employees stay on because they have an outlet for every snide remark they care to make on the web, than do because there’s a company picnic waiting for them in August. I’ve read a lot of blogs by people who don’t want to harm the firm, they just want to vent so they don’t go nuts. Or drive their spouse nuts.
It’s a good thing, really.
Later,
Kelly
3 July 2008, 5:35 pm
Kelly
They don’t give us ANY room to vent at the Widget Factory. The “Leaders” have ZERO sense of humor. If you dare question anything, the Thought Police come after you and quote The Bible According to Procedure. And then you get sent off to Big Brother Re-education Camp.
My GOD…though. If you guys think Brett and I are already funny, I can’t imagine what you’d do if we let loose and told you about the REALLY stupid things going on.
On a Stupid Scale of 10, I’ve been toning it down somewhat, I’ve only been posting threes.
Friar’s last blog post…It’s almost like they’re proud of it…
3 July 2008, 6:17 pm
Friar,
Oh, I know it’s not sanctioned, I’m just saying that if the WidgetMasters were to happen upon an itsy-bitsy blog article or two, they’d be wise to let it go. As would any employer. What you say when you’re not at work
is your own business.
The 10s on your scale? That’s for the super-secret blog, where we post anonymously—which would never work, because we’d all recognize each other’s complaints anyway. Or for a long evening of drinking at your local pub with Brett, which I suspect is where you’re off to this evening.
Life’s like that. There’s always a few 10s (9s, 8s…) that aren’t fit for the world to hear. Letting loose about the 3s gives the brain enough room to handle the higher-order messes. If those leaders were really trying to lead, they’d know that, and worry less about re-education and more about freeing your minds to do your best work for them.
Never happen with your WidgetMasters, I know. Something to look for in the next nookular facility. Maybe they’re not all so… tunnel-visioned.
Later,
Kelly
3 July 2008, 7:56 pm
“Do not put money in the ticket spitter.”
This is my all time favorite sign ever. It was on the parking stub machine at Moisant Airport in New Orleans.
( Oops. Louis Armstrong International Airport)
Happy 4th Kelly. Have fun tomorrow.
Janice Cartier’s last blog post…A Goal Setting Template- Part 4
3 July 2008, 9:12 pm
Janice,
LOL! That’s a classic!
Make usability obvious, and no one will put money in your ticket spitter. My grocery store has that problem. All day long in the automated checkout, people are trying to put money in, where the receipt comes out. Why the folks who prototype these things don’t watch regular people try to use them for long enough to find these flaws before they sell the machines, is beyond me.
Happy 4th to you also. I hope you barbecue up a storm and see some great fireworks.
Until later,
Kelly
4 July 2008, 1:12 am
Hope you have a good time. Pet the ponies for me.
4 July 2008, 1:13 am
Oh! look at that! You have subscribe to comments now!
4 July 2008, 8:35 am
Kelly,
Agreed – they would be wise to let a few of these go. It helps employee productivity immensely.
Happy 4th of July! Have a great day…
I am going to send you a couple of photos of some local signs, that you could use as a follow-up to this post. I think you’ll like them, and there’ll be a story with each one…
(don’t worry, they won’t get me dooced!)
^ ^
. .
^
o
-Brett
Brett Legree’s last blog post…viking fridays – a small hut.
4 July 2008, 9:12 am
Harry,
I will. Too crowded to take a ride today, but I’ll tell ‘em my favorite hack says Hi as I head into Independence Hall. I love doing all the touristy stuff with the masses of newbies on the 4th.
You have confirmed my suspicions, that my favorite Vegas Pen Man hasn’t poked his head in since the Great Change to WP. Hmm, the C.E. of the Goldwing? I see a good angle there… or just more link love?
Brett,
Signs, signs. Looking forward to it. I have several of the “good sign” variety, that I was considering following up with, but bad signs are such a fun and easy target, I had to lead with them. Hehe.
I’m off shortly, just have to check in with the virtual world first. I can’t be out of touch ALL day…
Until later,
Kelly
4 July 2008, 12:09 pm
Oh dear… The links I get… What google must think of me. (Would be tragic if I cared, wouldn’t it? LOL)
I’m always entertained by crazy signs. Of course, after laughing myself into a semi-coma (not to be confused with a semi-colon or a semi-comma), I do think “that can’t be good for business.”
I’ll have to send you some photos sometime of the junk we have around here. Much post material I can supply you with. Bwah ha ha.
Have fun in Philly.
Amy Derby’s last blog post…How I Scored Two New Freelance Blogging Jobs While Waiting For a Train