A Monday Series
Last Monday you walked the grounds. You’ve kept busy this summer with projects that have made a difference to your business in so many ways. This week, walk with me, deep inside one online Experience, then get ready to examine your own in the bright summer sun.
If you’re burnt-out, antsy, and need to revitalize your attitude as much as your business, this is the series for you. Experience Design for beach-dreaming business owners comes to your summer Mondays.
Summer Is a Great Time to Review Your Online Experience
So there’s this website that I’m a “member” of.
1. I hate when they say that. It sounds so bloody pretentious. It’s not a country club, for goodness’ sake, and if it were, I wouldn’t be a member anyway. It’s an email harvesting campaign. Just call it that.
I sometimes like the articles they write. So I “registered” (agreed to be harvested). Now and then they send me an email alert. I trundle off to read something ultra-fascinating once a month or less. The email says, “click here to read the full article.” When I click here, they pretend they don’t know I just came from the email they sent me, which means I am a doggone member.
2. Your emails will be smarter than this. When you harvest me, you’ll know you did, and not send me to some idiot landing page, pretending I just wandered in off the street. It’s so cold, man. I thought we were buddies. Just cold.
There I am, on the “landing page.” This is 2.0-speak for “time waster we hope won’t annoy you so much you click away, because we’re counting your clicks right now.”
It’s an endurance test to determine if I am a “true fan.”
I’m not. I’m a sap who likes their writing enough to jump through the hoops.
“Members sign in here: Member Name _______ Password _______.”
I’m kinda old, and I’m kinda busy. I know some of you may have a zillion login names because you have online stalkers dying to pilfer your massive bank accounts, and a sheet to decipher your codes so you can remember who you are where, but I’m a simple lady. I couldn’t remember all that, and I don’t want to. I’ve got only a couple of possibilities, all obscure, and none written down anywhere. In fact I only have more than one because a stalker did indeed attempt to cause me grievous electronic harm, and I had to diversify. So I type in my preferred membership name, and my password.
Here comes the punchline.
“Error: You did not enter your email address properly. Email Address _______ Password _______.”
Every. Effing. Time.
3. If my email address is my Member Name, and you CAN tell me that on the error page, why DIDN’T you tell me that on the sign-in page? Do you really think I stand, back against the wall, for you to ask me to dance each month, and that I will know what you mean by “Member Name” because it’s all been a breathless wait for you? That nothing might have pushed the memory of how to navigate your login out of my head in the meantime?
Wasting (potential) customers’ time: Bad. Making customers feel stupid: Worse. Ignoring the easiest fix in the world (what’s easier than phrasing it so I know what you want from me?): Absolutely incredible.
In case you were wondering: After the steam finished coming out of my ears (that would be, after I wrote this far in the blog post), I went back and gave them what they wanted. I logged in successfully.
Guess where it took me?
To a landing page with the title of the article, and the words, “click here to read the full article.”
I am not making this up.
Website or blog, logins or forms—What’s your online experience like? How many hoops do you want me to jump through?
Grow and be well,
Kelly Erickson












18 August 2008, 7:37 am
Bad. User. Interface.
There must be a school or something that teaches this, really.
-Brett
18 August 2008, 9:10 am
Brett,
User testing? We don’t need no stinkin’ testing!
(The school motto.)
Regards,
Kelly
18 August 2008, 9:54 am
I have little patience for websites that ask me too many things. If I have to sign the Magna Freaking Carta just to take a look at their site (which I’m not even sure I want to join in the first place), it’s not worth my bother.
Friar’s last blog post…Why I Think Northern Pike Are Awesome
18 August 2008, 10:15 am
That’s an interesting point Kelly — I’ve always liked the term “member” because it is has a bit of prestige. One of my software clients uses that term by default, but I’ve never considered that it might be offensive like that.
What would be more appropriate? “Friend” sounds a little too unprofessional (for most ventures) and “Registrant” is too, well you know…
Yeah, as to the click thing — much of that could be streamlined. Even the “tracking pages” can have great information and not leave the reader hanging. The sad thing is that it probably was user tested, but they didn’t see any apparent problems…
~Graham
Graham Strong’s last blog post…Blogging Au Naturel
18 August 2008, 10:48 am
Friar,
MFC. That totally cracked me up.
Sometimes it’s worth it to me, and sometimes I just can’t see in advance how many hoops there are, then once I get partly through the endurance test, I’m too stubborn to give up.
Graham,
I’d far prefer the simple, “sign up for email notification.” Then clicking the link in my email notification should take me behind the walls of the fortress. One step.
If I arrive in some other way, “Log in” with “Email address” would be fine. Why a blooming password at all? My email address will identify me as worthy, and there’s nothing sensitive being exchanged. No need for a password here.
About testing, I bet you are right that they think they did some. Any usability testing they did would have to have been by insiders, on insiders. I could set up usability testing in three minutes that would flag the biggest issues.
I run into it all the time, though. Folks who think that they don’t need outsider perspective, but don’t realize that because their team is looking at the stuff every day, they can’t possibly see the strengths or the weaknesses of the work—online or off.
It’s like being in love. You don’t see the flaws if you’re too deep into it.
Regards,
Kelly
18 August 2008, 3:09 pm
I’m amazed at your persistence Kelly. I would have given up after the first try, then unsubscribed the next time I received an email notice.
They must have some killer content to keep you going back…
Cheers,
Alex
Alex Fayle’s last blog post…Pursuing Happiness: Gretchen Rubin Interview
18 August 2008, 3:20 pm
Alex,
LOL. They do, actually, but I think short-term memory loss is to blame, also.
Until later,
Kelly
18 August 2008, 6:14 pm
Hmm. What’s in a name? Good point.
What happened to “membership has its privileges”? I guess that depends on whether this is a paid membership site, or as you say, an email harvesting campaign.
That MUST be some content.
Tiered access requires the same consideration as a bricks and mortar experience.
Janice Cartier’s last blog post…Chop Wood, Carry Water
18 August 2008, 6:54 pm
Janice,
Ho, ho! Good point. Can you imagine? Suppose I went to a restaurant, saw the front door, checked in at the hostess station to tell them I have a reservation (like the “membership”), then they asked me a bunch of questions they don’t really need the answers to (without telling me what kind of answers they’d like), made me wait—though I have a reservation, then said great, now go outside and come back in again! Never!
Until later,
Kelly
18 August 2008, 7:38 pm
Kelly,
Must be from the same folks who used to say, “it ain’t done til Lotus doesn’t run…”
(Apparently they used to say that at Microsoft about each new version of DOS. Not sure if it’s really true though. But each version of DOS did break certain applications…)
-Brett
Brett Legree’s last blog post…viking fridays – everything you always wanted to know about life change*
18 August 2008, 7:46 pm
Now this is EXACTLY why I refuse to deal with Bell through their website. Heck, I will suffer through Emily the Autmomated Voice Recognition System “Hello, my name is Emily. How may I help you?” than use the website. Okay, rant over, onto the intent of your article. Very good point, and I had a good discussion about number of clicks and lazy readers with James just last night. Very important to keep in mind for designing websites.
Urban Panther’s last blog post…The evolution of dance
18 August 2008, 7:49 pm
@Panther,
I wonder if someone monitored the “Emily line” how many people tell her to go frack herself.
(I wonder how many times it would sound a lot like me saying that… not that I’d ever do that *whistle, whistle, whistle* no, not me…)
-Brett
Brett Legree’s last blog post…viking fridays – everything you always wanted to know about life change*
18 August 2008, 8:05 pm
@Brett – I know my eldest daughter has told Emily exactly that several times. And then we she does make it past Emily, by the end of the call she has told a real live Bell person the exact same thing. My daugher and Bell do NOT get along.
Urban Panther’s last blog post…The evolution of dance
18 August 2008, 8:50 pm
@Panther
I HATE that Emily B***TCH.
Never in the History of Human Kind, has a woman’s voice angered so many.
(I think I’d rather listen to some boson from Banglador who can’t speak English…rather than listen to a robot-woman.
@Brett
LOTUS….?? What’s that? (Vaguely remember….it’s coming back to me now…mid 1980′s….something about a spreadsheet…that actually WORKED…without Windows…if I recall…???)
Imagine that.
18 August 2008, 8:52 pm
@Friar and Brett – my mother is still using Lotus.
Urban Panther’s last blog post…The evolution of dance
18 August 2008, 8:55 pm
Kelly-Exactly. At least at Dick and Jenny’s, if the restaurant keeps you waiting, you can get a drink and an appetizer while sitting on the benches outside. And the wait person will smile and get you a refill.
Sheesh.
Janice Cartier’s last blog post…Chop Wood, Carry Water
18 August 2008, 8:55 pm
@Panther,
Hey, if it works… did you ever read my blog post about Q10, or Monika’s about the same program?
If all you want to do is “just write something” and you run Windows, well, it’s pretty cool.
http://www.baara.com/q10/
There are a few others like this for Windows, and a few on Mac also (which reminds me, I must blog about them…)
Just like working on WordPerfect for DOS! And with a cool “clicky clicky” sound as well…
-Brett
Brett Legree’s last blog post…viking fridays – everything you always wanted to know about life change*
18 August 2008, 8:57 pm
Kelly: Oh yeah! That triggers my Internet Tourette’s everytime! A rant of insults that even surprise me start pouring from my mouth!
I actually tried to flirt with Emily once. Just wanted to have a little fun. Ended up telling her to F-off!
18 August 2008, 8:58 pm
Brett, Panther,
I guess I’m glad I don’t have Emily to deal with, though I’ve certainly suffered more than my share of automated phone trees. With one where I never got “press 8 for the problem you really have,” I tried explaining to the human I finally spoke with, how difficult it was and I asked what should I have pressed. The person said “I’ve never listened to our tree, I have no idea what you should press.”
Mini-rant about phone reps: they should ALL be required to listen to the phone tree and negotiate their way through it at least monthly, so they can sympathize and so they can suggest improvements or help the poor customer!
Some things are too easy to pick on. Telephone “service” is one of them.
Until later,
Kelly
18 August 2008, 9:03 pm
Lion,
Did I say “incorrigible flirt”? I mean, with an automated voice?
LOL—And where can I get one of these dudes?
Later,
Kelly
18 August 2008, 9:54 pm
Kelly: Always trying to have a bit of harmless fun! I sure hope they recorded it! At least it gave someone a laugh!
18 August 2008, 10:44 pm
A trick I heard for phone trees is if they ask you what language you prefer, key in “French”. It brings you to a human being right away, and then you can continue in English.
(Of course this is only applicable in Canada).
@Urban
I did my entire Master’s Thesis on LOTUS. (It worked fine).
Though I had to draw in some of the greek symbols by hand! (That was back 1988…!)
19 August 2008, 9:02 am
Lion,
Yep, you got me. All of you expressing your hostility at Emily in various ways—there’s a lesson here for Bell!
Friar,
Ooh. I wonder if that would work in Spanish here in the States?
Later,
Kelly
19 August 2008, 10:54 am
Kelly,
I don’t think it would work for spanish here. Everything has been translated now. In fact it’s press ONE for spanish. You have to wait until they get to the number for the english translation.
Anyway…I find forms impossible and my patience level…not so much there. I have to REALLY want to do something to put up with it all or the only button I am looking for is delete.
Wendi Kelly’s last blog post…For the Love of Words