Are you guilty as charged?
I look at your business in ways you probably don’t. That’s a good thing—you’re busy running your business. I’m busy soaking up and analyzing your Experience. When I look around, I see things you don’t know are there—good and bad. And sometimes, I might let it get to me, just a little bit.
I suppose if I weren’t feeling so darn ranty about it, I probably could have called this 10 Things You Can Fix to Get More Customers Today.
But I didn’t.
Herewith:
Ten near-fatal blows to Maximum Customer Experience
10. Disillusioned business owners.
Makes me sad to see that. Very, very hard to take action even when “a part of you wants to,” if you’ve given up hope.
9. The color orange.
There. I said it and I feel better. Orange makes people and places look bad. Sack it like a crummy employee. (Hahaha, Kelly, it’s pepping up your graphics right here at MCE. Yes, I know. But I’m not wearing it, and neither is the room I’m sitting in.) Close second: The color green, in restaurants. Appetite suppressant and general turn-off. Did you know that fast food places used to use green as a subliminal indicator to get you to leave fast?
8. A lack of clear web strategy.
What is you site doing for you? What do you, actively, do on the web, and why?
Worse, lack of Internet presence at all. I’d say we are rapidly approaching “too late” to get on the bandwagon except, there is always a newcomer to whom you’ll seem like you’ve been in place forever—if only you’re in place when they look for you. Do it now.
Oh, yeah. It shows.
6. Undervaluing design services.
You’ll spend $60,000 on a new company truck, but not spend somewhere around a thousand researching your Customer Experience strategy, or making your website a functional lead and revenue generator, or planning your interiors to maximize sales?
For fifty bucks I’ll tell you your fancy truck will never bring in one single new customer. Paint the old one.
Whoops. I told you for free.
5. Disrepair.
How can you let your customers sit on ripped vinyl benches, with stained acoustical tiles above their heads, and still wonder what you should do to make them feel special?
Take care of the details. That goes a long way toward making folks feel special.
4. Your name.
Ooh, sorry. I know you like it a lot, but yeah. I probably hate your business name. Take a look around—they’re mostly awful. They don’t make me want to buy and they don’t even make me curious. If you’re stuck with that name, you need to get a tagline that rocks. And quick.
We’ve invented the wheel, discovered the photon, built the railroads, grown Facebook and Craigslist and Twitter through word-of-mouth, and touched the moon. Yet most of us aren’t doing a quarter of what we could in our workaday lives. What could your staff do if you weren’t holding them back?
2. Rude service.
It’s related to #3, but it must be elevated to a position all its own. There’s no surer route to a lost sale.
1. Dirty businesses.
No, not that kind of dirty. Real, honest-to-goodness-how-can-you-not-notice-that, dirt. Filth. Easy to deal with, far too often ignored, and at the root of way more Customer Experience problems than I care to list.
From cheap fixes to big picture—sure, I hate these things now, but I know you can turn them around. Invest in the long-term health of your company by putting improved Customer Experience in place, starting today.
Your turn! Got a Customer Experience pet peeve? Share it in the comments. You know you want to!
Grow and be well,
Kelly Erickson
*Thanks to The Ad Contrarian, Bob Hoffman, who reminded me in a recent post that I hate a bunch of stuff, too. What else are 2.0-friends for?













27 March 2009, 8:00 am
Yeah…but A&W is ORANGE…and they’ve been around for over 50 years.
27 March 2009, 8:05 am
Some great ideas here Kelly! (Though I was a little shocked to hear you hate my name — you’re right, I do like it personally… And I do think I look good in orange, lol)
I did some work for a company once whose colours were brown and orange — in fact they still are. I’m not one for noticing such things myself, but even I saw the problem. It wasn’t even done ironically. That is one of the reasons why sales have declined, in my opinion. (Oh, and they got rid of me. I’m sure that didn’t help either!)
~Graham
Graham Strong’s last blog post…5 Steps To Better Brainstorming for the Intrepid Freelancer and Independent Business Owner
27 March 2009, 9:05 am
Actually, Harvey’s was quite orange and brown too, for the longest time.
(…Dammit. Now I’m craving cheeseburgers!)
27 March 2009, 9:11 am
Where else are going to strap on a feedbag when you get a hunger on between Milverton and Wawa…? (BTW, where’s “Milverton”?)
~Graham
Graham Strong’s last blog post…5 Steps To Better Brainstorming for the Intrepid Freelancer and Independent Business Owner
27 March 2009, 10:30 am
@Graham
Okay…I’m pretty good with STO (Small Town Ontario). But I have NO idea where Milverton is.
Wawa…well, THAT’s Different! That’s a bustling metropolis, for Northern Ontario.
(Though it dosen’t have an A&W….that would be in Marathon).
27 March 2009, 10:42 am
Yeah, it was on “How I Met Your Mother” this week. Kind of a long, convoluted story if you don’t watch the show. But there are a lot of Canadian references, many that are wildly inaccurate. I’m not sure if it is supposed to be funny or not, but it’s starting to get a little annoying.
As for A&W, there’s one before Marathon in White River (home of Winnie the Pooh). It’s right on the highway and next to the official Pooh gift store, so it’s super-convenient. There used to be one in Terrace Bay too, but last time we drove through it looked closed down. The Voyageur restaurant used to be the place we always stopped. I think there is still one in Soo…
Speaking of STO, I plan one day to drive from Graham, Ontario to Strong, Ontario. Graham is just west of Thunder Bay, but the only reason I know about Strong is because it’s the reason I can’t register “Strong.ca” — it’s reserved for the township, like all municipal names in Canada. Still unused, last I checked, and that just burns my buttons.
~Graham
Graham Strong’s last blog post…5 Steps To Better Brainstorming for the Intrepid Freelancer and Independent Business Owner
27 March 2009, 11:09 am
I’m sorry, but have you looked at your own site?
its very ugly and outdated. bad logo, bad colors, buttons from the 90s, and so on.
don’t mean to be rude, just been honest.
27 March 2009, 11:16 am
Pink cake scented air freshener in movie theater washrooms.
You see, I like to use the facilities and wash up before I get my food and settle in for a movie.
Washrooms should *not* smell edible.
A former senior VP of McDonalds was asked about the company colors, when they used to be gold and brown.
He said, “gold for the money we take from you, brown for the sh*t we serve you”.
Brought to you by a member of #3 above
27 March 2009, 2:23 pm
First things first:
Dear a,
Welcome, and thanks for your kind words. It’s a pleasure to have an anonymous flamer with a false email and no website help us to create an intelligent, productive discussion today. I only wish I could click through and admire your own vast talents.
Our comment policy, which you may view here, clearly states that we requires a full name and a valid email address for all insipid cowardly attacks designed purely to draw attention to your big, amazing mouth. Take a moment to familiarize yourself, as future inanities will be drop-kicked from the highest heights of my bad, bad site.
Don’t mean to be rude, just being honest.
Warmest,
Kelly
27 March 2009, 2:35 pm
Friar,
Naturally, A&W gets a pass. I mean, we’re talking root beer floats and hot dogs!
IMO: Some things survive because of, some things, in spite of.
Graham,
Getting rid of you was the biggest mistake A&W ever made.
Yeah, that’s a tough color combo to pull off. I suppose irony might help, but (hehe) that’s tough to pull off, too.
Brett,
Pink cake scented air freshener: Always an error. Eeew. I definitely should have included that! Washrooms generally are one of the things I notice most, if only because once you’ve been in the same location for more than a couple of weeks they seem to be something that owners and most of the staff notice least.
And thank goodness for #3, in a very roundabout way. I get some of my favorite readers (and blog-authors) because of it!
Regards all,
Kelly
27 March 2009, 3:00 pm
@a
If you’re such an expert on web-sites, then why don’t you show us what yours looks like?
Mabye we could all learn a thing or two.
27 March 2009, 3:34 pm
Kelly, very well said and all very true!
Disillusioned business owners are a very sad sight, breaks my heart to see them. Sometimes they can be reminded of why that started and can pep up again, often they should probably move on to something new.
And for the record, I like the orange highlights on here!
‘a’ is the reason I still moderate comments.
Melinda’s last blog post…Business Practices that Make you Look Bad
27 March 2009, 4:13 pm
Friar,
Thank you, my loyal knight. Rubies and a fiefdom in B.C. shall be yours. Carry on.
Melinda,
Hello and welcome! Glad you liked the post.
Oh, yes, #10 is such a persnickety problem, and it’s hard to really help out with. Lots of people get there… pushing through it can make a tremendous amount of difference in a very short period of time.
(“a” was in mod, but I’m afraid he or she was too interesting not to let out. If you’re going to write a post with the word “hate” in it, you have to be willing to hear from everybody, even those who can’t spell or capitalize…)
Until later,
Kelly
27 March 2009, 4:42 pm
Kelly,
I’m glad that the IT guys (not Eyeteaguy) haven’t totally locked you out – perhaps there is a fan there?
It gives me a lot of pleasure to be able to read this with my many cups of coffee!
Now, to “a”… just say the word, and we shall unleash the Viking Hordes!!!
^ ^
. .
^
o
Brett Legree’s last blog post…i am what i am, i am who i am. a guest post by eyeteaguy.
27 March 2009, 5:03 pm
Brett,
If the IT guys at The Factory are keeping an eye on me, then I wish they’d help you out with #3. Forcryingoutloud.
As for “a”: One thing about fake email addresses, you can’t subscribe to comments with ‘em. Wasted breath to spend another moment on it.
But I still had wicked fun.
^^
. .
^
o
Later,
Kelly
27 March 2009, 5:31 pm
@Kelly
Well, I don’t like to see my good friends pushed around. (Even though I know you’re perfectly capable of taking care of yourself)
I think if someone’s gonna make a snarky comment, then at least they should have the guts to leave a valid email address. Otherwise, it’s just a drive-by mouthing-off.
Brett, if you want to assemble a horde, I think Olaf ThunderFröck and Ursäal the Grumpy Bear are free tonight. Just let me know.
Friar’s last blog post…Things I WON’T do, when I retire.
27 March 2009, 6:36 pm
Geez, I thought I was an a$$hole. Maybe that is what “a” stands for?
When I worked at a motorcycle shop our only washroom was quite rude. So I asked to have it fixed up. No money so no go.
So I came in on a Sunday with a can of paint, a bucket of cleaners and an old sink my neighbour was throwing out. What a coup. Turned out we were the only place with a public washroom on that part of the street. But people would pee in the bushes rather than go to ours. Well after the makeover we had a marked increase in traffic.
That is a lesson well learned. Even if they didn’t buy anything they did visit and maybe told a friend.
Eyeteaguy
Eyeteaguy’s last blog post…What have you done for me lately?
27 March 2009, 6:48 pm
@Eyeteaguy
Heh.
“a$$hole”.
Gee!….WHATEVER word could you POSSIBLY be referring to?
Best.
Half-assed attempt.
At curbing one’s language.
Evar.
Friar’s last blog post…Suitable for covering your floor with…
27 March 2009, 6:49 pm
@Friar,
What the fcuk are you talking about?
Heh heh heh…
Brett Legree’s last blog post…i am what i am, i am who i am. a guest post by eyeteaguy.
27 March 2009, 7:02 pm
$hit, I have no effing idea what the fsck you ba$trds are bl00dy well talking about. What a bunch of crazy eights.
Eye#$%&guy
Eyeteaguy’s last blog post…What have you done for me lately?
27 March 2009, 7:08 pm
Now, gents, go have a nice dinner and relax. It’s cool.
Remember, “a” can’t even hear you. But my kid can.
Dissenters are welcome here. But if you want to avoid the Viking hordes, anonymity is not a recommended practice.
Later,
Kelly the Irish Killjoy (“Aww, Mom….”)
27 March 2009, 7:23 pm
I’ll bet your kid swears like a sailor. And I’m done supper so my blood sugars have stabilized. You should see me when I’m off my insulin, gosh darn it.
Eyeteaguy
Eyeteaguy’s last blog post…What have you done for me lately?
27 March 2009, 7:34 pm
Francis,
Haha. My kid thinks “darn” is harsh. We don’t even say “shut up” in our house. But as Friar knows and mocks, we have all the 1940s bad words out and polished, ready to go: doggoneit, blast, for crying out the pantry window, my gosh, and the ever-popular goodness gracious. (No kidding.)
Doesn’t mean she hasn’t heard stuff, but no, she’d never.
27 March 2009, 7:42 pm
Our house is the same Kelly. And I try and ban the word stupid as well, in relation to any person at least.
I remember DD coming home from pre-school (4yo) and next thing I hear is the ‘F’ word. “Mummy doesn’t say that so please don’t you say it, not nice” All is fine and I don’t hear it again.
Fast forward about a month. I have a minor car accident. Enough for me to come out with a few profanities in shock. And imagine this darling cute 4yo walking up and down the sidewalk happily repeating “F*** F*** S*** S***” over and over and over. Oops…..
We still laugh about that one.
Melinda’s last blog post…Business Practices that Make you Look Bad
27 March 2009, 7:47 pm
I must be truthful here. We don’t swear at home. As Melinda said, we don’t even say stupid. In fact we edited one of our kids books so stupid now says silly.
I know they will swear eventually but I’d like them to know that they don’t have to.
Good Heavens is as bad as it gets around here.
Eyeteguy
Eyeteaguy’s last blog post…What have you done for me lately?
27 March 2009, 8:01 pm
Francis,
One of my favorite books on marketing is titled “Your Marketing S**ks.” Without the stars, of course. I put a paper cover on it long, long ago, when she was an early reader. Didn’t really want her learning to read that right off. She asked, a while ago, what was wrong with it.
“The author put a bad word on the cover,” I said.
“Oh,” she said. “Probably sells better that way.”
Well, we know she’s my kid, at least…
Melinda,
You’re a woman after me own heart. There’s time enough for a kid to learn the bad words when some annoying high school friend breaks it to them that life is not perfect, like my buddies did. Now I can swear like a sailor, or not. I’m bilingual.
I really hate “stupid.” I also really hate “hate,” ironically enough. There isn’t much that really rises to that level, and if we save the word for when we need it, it has a lot more impact. But 10 things I Strongly Dislike… just didn’t have the same ring to it.
My kid (10) says to me one day, “I know all the swear words, Mama.” Then she starts counting them, but thankfully not listing them. When she got higher than the number I know, I started blushing. And I wouldn’t be at all surprised. There probably *are* more bad words than there were back “in caveman days,” as she says, when I was a kid.
What a world.
Hey, look, I took my own blog off-topic!
Again!
Until later,
Kelly
27 March 2009, 8:28 pm
Y’know Kelly. I like your style. I am glad I found you, I really am. You remind me of Friar’s mom. You don’t take me serious when I’m not and always curve the discussion back to a relevent and meaningful topic. And when I am serious, you respond in the most fascinating way, that usually sends my brian off on another tangent I hadn’t thought of or you teach me something.
As the kids say, you are “way cool”.
Eyeteaguy
Eyeteaguy’s last blog post…What have you done for me lately?
27 March 2009, 8:32 pm
What’s with this High School stuff? My DD is in year 6, High School next year, and in the last month I’ve been asked to explain C***, gay, abortion, and womaniser! And they’re only the most memorable conversations! Ai ai ai!
I used to swear – a lot – and stopped after hearing another female swearing profusely and realising how vulgar and unfeminine it sound. Not that I’m a particularly girly girl, however I didn’t like the butch image it presented!
It has gone a bit off topic hasn’t it!
Ummmm… bringing it back – I hate it when I hear a shop assistant swearing, it really puts me off shopping there. And I’ve heard it quite a few times lately, I think it has something to do with school leavers and uni students entering the workforce and not being properly trained in Maximum Customer Experience.
Melinda’s last blog post…Business Practices that Make you Look Bad
27 March 2009, 8:35 pm
Plus I call you Francis. Don’t forget that. It’s part of my “style.”
LOL. I say I’m not reading my email because I’m getting distracted by hijacking Friar’s blog, and you post a comment here to throw me.
As the kids say, you are “messing with me.”
In all seriousness, what I have loved about blogs since I found my first one about three years ago: they’re like a college dorm, in an all-night b.s. session that never ends. Sometimes smart, sometimes snarky, sometimes distracting, sometimes a real engine of growth. Being a part of this scene is 100% something I waited my whole life for without knowing it.
I’m glad you found me after I had a year or more of blogging under my belt—I think you really could have thrown me back when I was a newbie!
Later,
Kelly
27 March 2009, 8:42 pm
Melinda,
At 5′10″, “unfeminine” is the story of my life. Somehow, tall and feminine have a hard time going together. Luckily, that stopped bugging me somewhere around 5′8″.
Ooh, yes. Shop assistants swearing. I have noticed that a lot. That’s one of those things under #2 that made it a stand-alone problem, even though it’s closely linked to #3. That and talking amongst themselves to the exclusion of the customer, gabbing on the phone to buddies… ooh, I’d better not get started. I’ll never get tomorrow’s post written this way!
Later,
Kelly
27 March 2009, 8:47 pm
Tricia Helfer is 5′10″ and pretty darned feminine if you ask me…
Brett Legree’s last blog post…i am what i am, i am who i am. a guest post by eyeteaguy.
27 March 2009, 8:57 pm
Brett,
Whoa.
I had no idea who she was, had to look her up, and… well, to say that train passed me long ago (and I wasn’t on it) would be an understatement.
Probably don’t want to know how you knew how tall she is.
Later…
27 March 2009, 9:00 pm
Hey Brett, butt out! We’re having a mutual admiration society meeting here…
Eyeteaguy’s last blog post…What have you done for me lately?
27 March 2009, 9:08 pm
I had to look her up too!
“Tricia Helfer is 5′10″ and pretty darned feminine if you ask me…” spoken like a man…. LOLOL!
Melinda’s last blog post…Business Practices that Make you Look Bad
27 March 2009, 10:34 pm
Wow…I leave for a few hours to go see a movie…and lookit all the comments here. I seem to have missed the party.
Regarding swearing with 1940 words. You forget “Land sakes”.
I really enjoy creative swearing. It takes a talent. Some of the best is from Trailer Park Boys (which you can check out on You-Tube).
Friar’s last blog post…Suitable for covering your floor with…
27 March 2009, 10:41 pm
Friar,
Darn, I never use land sakes! That’s a fine one.
I bet you could tell a Customer Experience tale or two from the theatre. I always get a story or two out of going to the movies. *shivers*
Later…
28 March 2009, 7:18 am
Tricia played the Cylon operative Number Six on the Battlestar Galactica series (which was the only TV show I could say I regularly watched for the last four years).
She was sort of famous (well, famous in Canada) many years ago when she was discovered by a modeling agency, I guess she was turning heads in small town Alberta.
As far as how I knew how tall she is, it was a guess which was confirmed by Google of course. Most models are pretty tall, so I just Googled one I liked
and I guess I’m a good judge of height!
Brett Legree’s last blog post…i am what i am, i am who i am. a guest post by eyeteaguy.
28 March 2009, 8:07 am
Too many comments for me to bother reading to see if it’s been said (and I say this fondly knowing that the comment section here often gets derailed and onto something irrelevant, so… yeah!)
Making me wait. Don’t make me fucking wait. I’m here with money to give to YOU, someone who wants my money. Don’t make me wait to do it, because believe me, I don’t REALLY want to give you my money.
I recently stood in a line for 20 minutes. After minute 2, I began debating walking out of the store. Do you want to know why I didn’t? Because the impact of that action would have been lost on your Number 3, a rude cashier who didn’t give a damn about the business, her job, or me.
James Chartrand – Men with Pens’s last blog post…Are You Struggling Over a Small Readership?
28 March 2009, 10:18 am
Brett,
See, I got everything but her height from her official bio when I searched. But I did notice she’d been in Mr. Hefner’s magazine, so I thought perhaps you’d found her height right next to “Turn-ons: fluffy clouds and newborn puppies on the grain farm back home in Alberta.”
James,
We never go off-topic here.
You should’a read it, this post had an awesome comment section. I wish every one was so fabulous.
Um, so you wanted to make an protest by leaving with your dollars, but you gave them your doggone money out of spite?
1. I love that. ROFL.
2. I’ve done that.
3. Human beings are just plain weird, aren’t we?
Making people wait generally, bad. Making James wait, unthinkable. Truly, that’s another tweak that is amazingly ignored. There are fewer shoppers (diners, patients, whatever) than ever. Roll out the darned red carpet for the ones who are left, or they’re gonna go home and put that money in the piggy bank, people!
Until later,
Kelly
28 March 2009, 10:20 am
“Making people wait generally, bad. Making James wait, unthinkable.”
I’ll admit I’ve had moments where I stood there fuming thinking, “Do they *know* who I *am*?”
But don’t tell anyone. They might think I have an ego or something.
James Chartrand – Men with Pens’s last blog post…Are You Struggling Over a Small Readership?
28 March 2009, 10:26 am
‘Zactly.
28 March 2009, 10:41 am
@Kelly,
I only read that magazine for the *articles*, honest
but seriously whenever I want info on something I just ask Google directly rather than go to official sites and so forth. Much faster!
@James,
Local newspapers are a good place to give “informal business reviews”, good or bad. Just ask Friar… watch out for old folks with pitchforks, though.
Brett Legree’s last blog post…i am what i am, i am who i am. a guest post by eyeteaguy.
28 March 2009, 10:46 am
How did we get back on topic. Darn, now I’ll have to say something relevant.
I was at a Canadian Tire store and the line up was huge! 2 cashiers on a Monday night. That’s good planning, not! I was there with my father-in-law and we both had carts full of stuff including a birthday present for my daighter. We couldn’t leave as her birthday was that day.
So I used my cell phone to call the store….. no answer. So I called corporate headquarters. Paged their emergency person and whan an iritatated person answered I said we need more cashiers at the store in Smallville. I was told that this was an innapropriate use of the emergency line. I said losing 100 customers FOR GOOD was an emergency because right after I hang up I am going to call all my friends and tell them what you just told me…. and I know a lot of people.
She said she would see waht she could do. 20 minutes later 2 employees walked in the door and opened tills. One was a manager (he was wearing a tie). I jumped into his line. When it was my turn I asked why so few registers were open. He said that it was dinner time and they were all out at A&W. What?! Then he said some a$$hole called corporate and they called him on his cell to get back to the store.
I grabbed my stuff told him I was the a$$hole that called and advised him that I would never shop at his store again.
I never did. And they closed the whole store later that year. That is a Minimum Customer Experience.
The new store is further away but has 25 check-out, 6 self serve checkouts and I love shopping there.
Eyeteaguy
Eyeteaguy’s last blog post…What have you done for me lately?
28 March 2009, 10:51 am
@ EyeTea – That’s the best story I’ve heard in a while. Rock on!
James Chartrand – Men with Pens’s last blog post…Are You Struggling Over a Small Readership?
28 March 2009, 10:54 am
James,
You beat me to it.
Francis,
Awesome, awesome story. I was laughing and crying for you. Thanks! I love the inappropriate use of the emergency line. Um, what’s the appropriate use?
28 March 2009, 11:01 am
@Eyeteaguy,
Classic… you see, the Canadian Tire in Splat Creek used to be just as bad. Well, it still is, even though they put in a brand new store. So I’m used to driving 40 minutes to the bigger, better one in the next large town.
The icing on the cake for the “new store” though had to be the automatic doors that aren’t.
The doors came with the labels that say, “Caution – Automatic Doors” and so (silly me) assumed that they were the first time I went in there. Lost in thought as usual…
So I walked into the door.
I complained. I was told they had decided not to install the door openers – budget.
Why, why, why does everything in this town have to be so half-assed?
I didn’t even bother complaining, I just stopped going there.
Brett Legree’s last blog post…i am what i am, i am who i am. a guest post by eyeteaguy.
28 March 2009, 12:54 pm
LOL – How come every story that starts “I was at Canadian Tire the other day…” ends badly?
My boys bought me a digital tape measure for Christmas. ‘Cept they didn’t have any so I got a gift card instead. So every weekend or so when I’m in the area, I drop by to see if they’ve come in. They finally did — last week. Almost three months after the fact.
In this case, someone actually offered to help me though (GASP!) — I don’t think that has ever happened to me at CT. In fact quite the opposite — I usually have to hunt someone down and “bother” them with question. But this guy actually checked to see if it was going on sale anytime soon, and was going to give me the sale price. It wasn’t, but hey, it’s the thought that counts, and I thanked him for that.
So there’s a CT story that sort of has a good ending…
~Graham
28 March 2009, 1:01 pm
@Kelly and Melinda — just read back a bit — we don’t use words like “stupid”, “hate”, “shut up” or any of those words in our house either. Of course I use them in passing (not “shut up”, the others) and the kids correct me. And I thank them for it. Because they are powerful words, more powerful than swearing in my opinion. Maybe because they are designed to hurt. I mean “F– You” is pretty strong, but “You’re stupid, I hate you” is even stronger. The former is an emotion merely directed, but the latter is a personal attack.
~Graham
Graham Strong’s last blog post…5 Steps To Better Brainstorming for the Intrepid Freelancer and Independent Business Owner
28 March 2009, 1:02 pm
@Brett
HAHHAH! Doncha love that…big brand huge Crappy Tire store…biggest new multi-million dollar expansion to happen in this hick-town within the last 30 years…and they can’t spring a few thousand extra for AUTOMATIC DOORS.
I remember having a very heavy cart full of bags of soil for my garden. Weighed hundreds of pounds. And the doors wouldn’t open.
Well…screw it. I pushed pushed and MADE the doors open. With the cart dinging directly against the glass. It’s only a matter of time before it breaks. I hope it’s me.
@Eyeteaguy
Our old small Crappy Tire store only had 2 cashiers, at most. There was ALWAYS a line-up.
Then they built this huge brand new Crappy Tire, muchy much larger, with a Marks Work Whorehouse attached.
….but it’s STILL with only 2 cashiers.
Go Figure. Only in Splat Creek. (Sigh).
Friar’s last blog post…Suitable for covering your floor with…
28 March 2009, 5:49 pm
Well said Graham, and totally true.
Great story Eyeteaguy, unbelievable! And yeah, what’s an appropriate use of the emergency line?
Melinda’s last blog post…Business Practices that Make you Look Bad
28 March 2009, 6:41 pm
Brett,
I love the non-automatic automatic doors. I’ve walked into ones I assumed were automatic before… if there was a reassuring sign on them, I’d definitely do it. Good grief. Talk about misplaced values.
Graham,
Sort of a good ending, ‘cept the part where you must have spent fifty bucks in gas checking for the thing weekly for three months! Yeesh!
At least you got pleasant service at the end of all that hassle.
Agreed, agreed about personal attacks. We’re… quite aware of the effect, and I’m sure that has plenty to do with why we take such care with the language. It’s far too easy to become insensitive to the little stuff, then to more and more… no, thanks.
And my daughter is a big corrector. Goes both ways, I’m sure, but it is funny being called out for saying “crap” once in a while by a pint-sized person. (Much better than the alternative, so I’ll take it.)
Friar,
Well, since you’ve made the experience of CT seem nearly unanimous, I’m going to say I’m glad I’ve never been in one.
It appears, from the variety of stuff you can get at the place, they also belong at #4 on my list. For about two seconds I thought y’all were getting Christmas gifts and such at an auto parts store. Which, umm, made the Trailer Park Boys thing seem about right. So I’ve looked them up now, and I see their name is useless, except as a reminder of yet another horror story!
Until later,
Kelly
28 March 2009, 6:49 pm
Kelly,
I probably sounded a bit like a whiner there, but we really seem to get the short end of the stick here sometimes.
Example:
I have been to various Wal-Mart stores in Canada and the USA over the last ~10 years. *EVERY SINGLE ONE* I have been into – except for the one near us – has automatic faucets in the washrooms, automatic blow dryers, automatic toilets…
But for us? Nope. *WE* get the old fashioned ones you have to turn/press/flush. The only reason why, as far as I can figure, is that they figure “we won’t notice”. We’re a bunch of hicks up here. Sheeat, we only have a nookular plant here.
Argh. Highest concentration of Ph.D.’s in all of Canada, including our Dear Friar, and the bleedin’ doors at the local Crappy Tire don’t even open themselves…
Canadian Tire is a cool store – just not here.
Brett Legree’s last blog post…i am what i am, i am who i am. a guest post by eyeteaguy.
28 March 2009, 6:52 pm
LOL, dear Brett.
If you were trying to get past the whiner thang, you’re gonna have to try a bit harder.
Walking away, still laughing.
Later,
Kelly
28 March 2009, 11:39 pm
So Canadian Tire isn’t an auto store? I was also wondering why you were buying your daughter’s birthday presents there too! Then I figured, maybe pink car seats, maybe she’s a car buff, whatever. LOL!
@ James, sorry to tell you this, but they probably didn’t know you you were. Might be familiar with the arm and the guitar, but didn’t recognise your face. LOL!
Melinda’s last blog post…Business Practices that Make you Look Bad
28 March 2009, 11:47 pm
Meant to add on my last comment, I plan to link to this post in another one I’m doing on bad business practices. Must remember to add a profanity warning! LOL! Thanks…..
Melinda’s last blog post…Business Practices that Make you Look Bad
29 March 2009, 9:07 am
Melinda,
Sometimes when we non-Canadians *dare* to participate in my own comments section, the results are hilarious. I’ve been to Canada enough to know Tim Horton’s and Chapters pretty well, but when we get down to Harvey’s (and now I can add Trailer Park Boys and Canadian Tire), I have to thank goodness I can do a quick search on the ‘net to keep from looking like a dummy at my own blog. LOL at pink car seats!!
Thanks in advance for the link-love. Looking forward to reading your post!
Until later,
Kelly
29 March 2009, 6:51 pm
@Melinda
“Canadian Tire…MORE than just tires!”. (Or so the ad campaign used to say).
@Kelly
Actually, like Brett says, with the excecption of where we live, Canadian Tire is a pretty cool store (especially for the Red-Green type of males).
Hunting, fishing, camping, automotive, tools, sports, deck furniture..what’s NOT to like?
(Except the fact that a lot of their stuff is now cheap-made-in-China crap).
@Brett
Didja see the Crappy Tire gas station? The pay-at-the-pump never seems to work with my Visa Gold card. Never mind that my card words pretty much in every other gas station in Canada and the States. Just NOT here.
Too bad. That would have put the grand total of pay-at-the-pump stations in our area up to THREE.
Heck, I’ve payed at the pump all over the place, in ALASKA. But apparently, the Splat Creek Valley hasn’t caught onto this new-fangled technology yet.
Folks, if you think I’m exagerrating, I’m NOT. There’s only one pay-at-the pump in town. Another one 45 minutes away. And that’s IT, for at least an hour’s drive in any direction.
29 March 2009, 6:59 pm
@Friar,
Since we’re picking on the new Crappy Tire store, I have a beef with the gas station too. In addition to the swipe cards not working at the pumps, the pumps themselves are a bit unusual.
You’ve got 6 pumps with two nozzles on each for a grand total of 12 filling stations.
And your choices are regular (87 octane), and diesel. No mid-grade, no high-test (well, 91 octane is “high-test” here, no 97 octane to be found in town).
So I’ve only put gas in my car there once – why? Because my car likes 91 octane – and if anyone thinks that “gas is gas”, I can show you a spreadsheet that will show you how much my mileage drops when I put 87 octane in the car.
On the flip side…
Because the Crappy Tire Gas tries to beat everyone on price, the other gas station (the one with the pay at the pump that does work) has to lower prices too – so my high-test is actually pretty reasonable now.
Brett Legree’s last blog post…full circle.
30 March 2009, 12:06 am
@Brett
Yeah…I noticed the other gas stations had to drop their prices, since the new Crappy Tire came in.
Now isn’t that SPECIAL?
Amazing,what a little healthy competition can do, to break up monopolies!
Friar’s last blog post…Perfessor Friar rambles about cars, fuel cells and saving the planet.
30 March 2009, 6:10 am
Holy cow, guys… bitter, much?
Look, we have a Canadian Tire. It’s fine. It’s nice. Everything works. They have ample staff, the doors work, it’s a great place. I’m in a small town out in the boonies just like you.
James Chartrand – Men with Pens’s last blog post…Are You Struggling Over a Small Readership?
30 March 2009, 6:41 am
Hm. I appreciate what Friar said—that except for in Splat Creek it’s a pretty cool store. Which, from an Experience standpoint, makes me wonder what’s going on at corporate. The smaller the town, the more you’ll rely on the local big box store, so it is bound to inspire some fierce feelings. CT sounds like a place that needs to keep an eye on company-wide consistency.
Thanks, guys, for the discussion. I think “inconsistent execution” should be #11 on this list.
Later,
Kelly
30 March 2009, 11:29 am
You know, each small town is different. Just because a store on one town is great, dosen’t mean the same thing applies for another town.
That’s all I’m gonna say now…’cause I dont’ want to be accused of being any more “bitter” than I already am.
30 March 2009, 11:57 am
(Friar and I were kind of kidding around, too.)
30 March 2009, 6:20 pm
I’ve been to Splat Creek. I lived there for 2 months.
What I think Brett and Friar are getting at is that is could be better, it should be better. There are some very smart, rich people in that town.
Its the wasted potential that is getting them down. The folks there just aren’t trying, they are letting the plce get to them.
I was shocked that everything closed at 6. What about the people who work? The stores are crap, ut no one complains and there is no competition so it al decays and they all stand arouns and watch.
I have also lived in STO where all this is not true. Whete the customer experience is maximized. And I loved going there.
All that being said I love the Canadian Tire stories. #11 is very true. Its all the more ironic that automatic doors don’t work in a town full of nuclear engineers. It would be like no pay at the pump at the JPL. The irony wuld be killer.
Eyeteaguy
Eyeteaguy’s last blog post…What have you done for me lately?
30 March 2009, 6:34 pm
@ Eyetea – Shocked that stores close at 6? Um, don’t come visit my way – stores close at 5 unless it’s a Thursday or Friday…
In fact, Walmart opened 24 hours a day for the holidays and WE were shocked – don’t the employees get to rest and have a decent life??
Customer experience does *not* depend on your store hours. If they’re consistent and you do a good job, you’ve done your job. Period. People don’t *have* to join the 24/7 workweek, and to be really honest, it’s not healthy.
James Chartrand – Men with Pens’s last blog post…What a Rotten Roof Can Teach You About Your Business
30 March 2009, 6:58 pm
If your store does not have hours that are compatible with my work schedule, then I don’t go to your store. Therefore, your store’s customer experience does depend on your store hours, for me.
Brett Legree’s last blog post…full circle.
30 March 2009, 7:12 pm
Let’s take that another way.
Men with Pens is not open 24/7. Are you saying that we have a sucky customer experience because we’re not available when a client is off work? Obviously we’re not the right supplier for many people, because we do cut out at 7pm and we do take weekends off. It’s our right. Sorry.
Come on. These arguments that you’re putting forth are very self-centered and limited. Not everyone works the same hours as everyone else, and one bad store does not a shitty empire make.
You may not agree personally with my views, and you may believe that your convenience matters to everyone’s personal customer experience, but unfortunately, that’s a bit of an egotistical view. What I prefer in an experience is not what you prefer, and vice versa.
Look, I get you’re trying to complain about bad service in your town. I get that, I really do. I hear your frustration, and I understand it. But I think you’re painting everyone black to serve your own purposes, and that’s wrong, and that’s why I’m speaking up.
(Sorry. I like you lots as a person. But I’m disagreeing.)
James Chartrand – Men with Pens’s last blog post…What a Rotten Roof Can Teach You About Your Business
30 March 2009, 7:20 pm
Hmm, I worked for years in the service industry. We had 2 part time shifts. 8-2, 2-8. We were 9-5 before. The employees loved it, our sales increased 30% and the part timers could work it out amongst themselves what shift they worked including lunches and breaks. Turns out people LIKED to shop as a form of relaxation. Our employees had a life and now they could enjoy the days as well as nights. We all won.
I suggest to Mr. Chartrand that his small town mentality is suited to his small town. If you are happy there then all is well.
However I am guessing that the small town is dissappearing for a variety of reasons. I for one understand these reasons and will not get in their way. In fact I may help facilitate them.
And on your point of not being healthy. I agree with that. We have gone too far the one way. I am on call 24/7 and I am not happy about it. But until we can grow and justify some help, that is the situation. It is up to me to make my workplace better. And I have by making things stable and having some good off-hours help.
Eyeteaguy
Eyeteaguy’s last blog post…What have you done for me lately?
30 March 2009, 7:26 pm
Mr. Chartrand. I am bowing out of this conversation. You win, congratulations.
Eyeteaguy
Eyeteaguy’s last blog post…What have you done for me lately?
30 March 2009, 7:52 pm
@ Eyetea – Relax. It’s not a fight of champions.
Anyways, agreed. Enough said, and moving on.
James Chartrand – Men with Pens’s last blog post…What a Rotten Roof Can Teach You About Your Business